You’re so beautiful, when I look at you my heart starts beating

…which is reported to be a classic among vampires out on the pull, by AZCactus (Twitter). I guess the Transylvanian reference makes this chat-up line qualify as a foreign classic.

Only with the help of an online translation service, can we come up with what this pickup line would originally have sounded like:

Esti asa de frumos. Când mă uit la tine, inima mea bate începe.

Vampires and other Transylvanians are welcome — not in my house but to correct any mistakes in that line. So please write a comment if you like.

Met jou wil ik wel eens een beschuitje eten.

Ok I may have to explain this Dutch line. Lemme translate — loosely:

Hmm I’d sure love to have breakfast with you one day

Sounds innocent enough, but if you think about it for more than two seconds, it’s obvious what is meant here.

Will people fall for this one? They just might. It has been used in TV commercials by now though, so that’s not helping really. But it’s still quite clever, so it might get you a proper breakfast date if nothing else.

Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?

As a chat-up line, this one is pretty direct. It sounds really fancy because of the language, but most people with a decent high school education will just slap you in the face. Maybe you can get away with it if you sing it. Please report back if singing actually works* (fingers crossed).

All that said: it’s French so it sounds sexy even if it is not the best line to use on someone. Practise on the accent.

* it may actually have worked for Patti Labelle, Christina Aguilera and Pink (who — for the record — have all performed the song “Lady Marmalade” which is famous for this particular chat-up line).

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