Don’t tell me: you’re a Pisces, right?

Really — unless you know exactly what you’re doing (for instance if you happen to know your target’s birthday) — please don’t try and guess people’s star signs.

Here’s why:

  • People who are into that are mainly hippies and new age freaks. Best not to get involved except if you’re a hippie fetishist.
  • You have a 1/12 chance to get it right, meaning that you have a 92% chance to get it wrong. Guess the wrong star sign and you might gravely offend the object of your attention.
  • Even if you get it right, what on earth is gonna be your next line? It’s really gonna have to be profound and sensitive and knowledgeable. If you were all that, you wouldn’t need to come up with a line like this in the first place.
  • They’re gonna ask for your star sign too and after that they’re probably gonna tell you that “Capricorns and Pisces don’t match” anyway.

Just so you know what you’re getting into…

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